Published Tuesday January 30th, 2007 from Camarillo, CA. Listening to tracks I bought from TrackItDown to DJ with, feeling mostly lost, and a little insane.

I took note of my tunnel vision today. Driving back to work after my lunch break I realised how narrow my perception of my vision seemed to be. For the rest of the day at work I tried to shake it off and somehow escape the feeling that I was deep within a shall staring out into the world through a tiny peep-hole. I was pretty sure I had felt similarly in the past, and a quick search through my blog confirmed.

"Heh, I noticed today something which I've noticed many times before, but wrote down today. When I'm in a certain bad mood. Cranky, tired, agitated, irritated of annoyed, or a combination and I don't really wish to deal with the world, I see only a very select thing in front of me. My perception of the world is changed, and what i see in my eyes is darkened around the edges. A sort of vignetting occurs around the edge of my vision kind of like in the following poorly edited photo:

Just a kind of interesting observation with a little rant here, and a horrible visualisation of what I am talking about. I have a similar experience when I'm very busy, or stressed or am rushed. I suppose one could say that my visual comprehension is diminished, either intentionally because I don't want to see the world, or because I'm busy thinking about other things that I can't deal with the rest of what my eye sees and thus, in the end, I get this vignetting effect in my perceived vision."
From "The Wear and Tear." posted Thursday August 19th, 2004

This also showed me that my blog is much more an archive of my life, my thoughts, and my emotions than I had previously realised. Maybe one day I can edit it (my blog) down into something useful and interesting.

I also took note of myself doing this thing where I'll think something, and think that I am saying it out loud.. But in actuality I'm just saying it in my mind and am instead in reality just standing there silently. I wont even realize this until the moment has passed and I go back in my thoughts and realise, "No wonder they just blankly stared at me." This seems to happen to me a lot at work. My boss, Lance, will ask me something and I'll just smile at him while thinking that I told him what I had thought in reply to his answer.

I would ramble more, and perhaps vastly improve the quality of this entry were it not already past midnight. This will probably be the last entry for January. Oh well..